The “Real” Elite
Ξ December 19th, 2009 | → | ∇ Daily Ramblings, Rants, Politics/Environment |
I have come to believe that they want us all to die. All the sick, the disabled, the creative ones unable or unwilling to conform. I have never been very fond of life… too painful for my tastes. But I’ve recently released a lifetime’s cache of creativity and I want nothing more than to have a life and a body capable of bringing my visions to life.
But I’ve discovered myself too late… my body has been all but destroyed by the poisons of our “great civilization”, both the very real and toxic poisons we ingest, inject, irradiate, etc… and the poison of the mandate to conform.
Even if I had my health back, what I would have to give this civilization is something it no longer values. Art is dying. Right alongside the rain forests, polar bears, frogs, and freethinking wo/men. Extinction is all I see when I close my physical eyes and really see.
We are done and the humanoid creatures in their limousines and private jets will inherit a wasteland. Maybe they’ll find a way to cruise their yachts forever around the globe and live on great stockpiles of Spam and Twinkies that will not rot before they do.
on December 21st, 2009 at 10:13 am
My heart went out to you
but what to say…
your body feels tired
and your soul connection feels weakened
I have no empirical proof to offer
only my feelings are strong
that art is not dying
but on the edge of a renewal…
it only seems this way now
as this is what the “powers” want us to believe
Creativity is the key to our moving toward this place of knowing our power
Creativity is a manifestation of that power
Your power has not left you
will never leave you
it is there for you to create with
and it will flow through you and continue to lift you through the uncertainty
Nurture it and love will flow and heal
you’ll see
Namaste Alex
on December 31st, 2009 at 5:37 am
Thank you for your kind and hopeful words. Sometimes it seems the only ones “reading” blogs are those selling porn, viagra and get-rich-quick schemes. It’s so nice to see a “real” comment when I periodically delete the hundreds of spams (no twinkies here though).
Yes, my body is very, very tired and I fantasize endlessly it seems about being among the elite, those with wealth, not so I can have yachts and mansions but so I can hire people (whom so many of are of course in desperate need of work) to do the mundane and tedious (but to me, the grueling and exhausting) work of everyday life so I can make my art without interruption by hunger and fatigue, depression and disgust.
I do feel tremendous power, as an artist, as a human, but I feel the sickness of the world flowing through my body as if my disease were the earth’s disease. I know she hurts as I do and longs for beauty and freedom from pain and ugliness.
I believe that better times are coming, some time after the collapse of life as we recognize it today, but I fear that I don’t have the strength to see it, not in this body anyway.
It’s funny how my recently reawakened spirituality has made me see the absurdity of material wealth, the triviality of most of what our fellow citizens deem to be valuable and even necessary. It’s funny that all of a sudden, when I am finally finding my vision, finally able to explore who I really am and where I am going, that I suddenly and totally unexpectedly long to be able be healthy and able to create amazing and complex pieces of art (that are far beyond me now) and make my mark as an “artist” of the 21st century. All my life I did never dare to dream of such things and now that I can and do, it is only a phantom. And yet it feels so real and possible at the same time, though it cannot be. I suppose that’s the power of the Kundalini, making its own strange reality.
Healing… now that seems quite elusive. Every time I seem to find a secret to greater health, it seems to work against my body, not for it. As if I have it all backwards or something. The more I try to nurture my health, the more the fatigue takes over everything. I am beyond confused and too tired to puzzle it out.
on January 6th, 2010 at 10:44 pm
Hey! I have just found your new post and that is so wonderful that you have re-connected with you!
Oh I relate very much to getting through the day to day. I have very positive feelings that we will see more and more that will help us to live simply, and also relieve us from repetitiveness to free our souls for doing what we love. With so many inspired technicians amongst us and a world moving toward sharing our knowledge and moving away from being wealth driven. I know in my own life, so much has become unimportant now. I know that I am preparing to become a child of the world, no longer identified as a woman in Australia, but a soul with the world as a home. It’s exciting, and I sometimes feel it’s not happening fast enough, usually seeing afterwards that things needed to happen in a way to enable moving forward to the next step.
I love the work that you have on Esty, please keep bringing wonderful things to your experience and ours!
May you have a perfect life, perfect health and a magical future!
With much love,
Aeve